Love languages: new ways to say 'I love you'

In the '90s, Dr. Gary Chapman had us all talking about the five love languages: affirmation, quality time, receiving gifts, acts of service, and physical touch. According to Chapman's model, each of us is most receptive to love expressed in one of these five ways, and for the healthy and longevity of your relationship it is well worth learning which language your partner speaks. A recent reevaluation of this model suggests, however, that there may be as many as seven different (and new) love languages!

Curious? Check out this gallery to learn all about the seven new love languages and how you can speak them.

Introducing the seven new love languages

The seven new love languages are: activity, appreciation, emotional, financial, intellectual, physical, and practical.

Each of these so-called 'languages’ describes a way in which it is possible to receive and feel love in a relationship.

Understanding and speaking your partner’s love language (they may even speak a combination of more than one) can help strengthen your relationship.

Activity

The first love language on the list is activity. If this is your love language, you feel most loved and valued when spending time doing activities with your partner.

You may also feel particularly appreciated when your partner pays close attention to your hobbies and the things you enjoy doing in your free time.

Appreciation

Next on the list is appreciation. People who speak this language tend to feel most loved and seen when their partner acknowledges and compliments them.

But don’t be fooled: this language is not about flattery. Rather it is about genuine appreciation that makes the person feel valued and seen.

Emotional

People who speak this language tend to enjoy long conversations with their partner, and they really rely on them for support during tough times.

Financial

Next up is financial. If you feel loved and appreciated when your partner spends money on you, your love language is probably financial.

This one is similar to the "gift giving" language in the original model, although that is more about thoughtful gifts, and this is more about the investment of resources in a partner.

Intellectual

They tend to engage with their partner on a range of different topics, and while they might disagree with their partner at times, they are always respectful of their opinion.

Physical

Next on the list is physical. If you feel most loved by your partner when you are in close physical contact with them, this is probably your language.

It is also important to people who speak the physical language that they are not the only one initiating contact all the time; their partner should show desire and initiative sometimes too.

Practical

In order for communication in this language to be effective, one partner needs to help out the other without being asked. It is about making the mental load lighter.

Why the love languages are important

Learning to speak your partner’s love language is important; partners who make an effort to do so report having stronger and healthier relationships.

Recognize your own love language

So, take some time to work out what your own love language is and communicate it to your partner.

Things to bear in mind

Bear in mind that your partner’s love language may be very different from yours. For example, if you don’t care in the slightest whether your partner spends money on you, you may find it difficult to understand why they do.