Signs you might have 'Main Character Syndrome'

We’ve all gazed wistfully out of a train or car window, music playing in the background, imagining ourselves and our lives as though from a camera. It’s deliciously indulgent to imagine ourselves as a protagonist, and indeed we are the only characters we’ll ever be in this life, but where is the line?

Social media and Gen Z were quick to find it, and they’ve dubbed it “Main Character Syndrome.” Though not an official diagnosis, many psychologists are now looking into this new phenomenon, from why it’s so prevalent, to the negative effects it can have on your health and your relationships.

Click through to find out what Main Character Syndrome is, the signs that indicate you might have it, and why it’s increasingly important for us to address it.

What is it?

"Main character syndrome" is a term popularized by a younger generation, largely on TikTok, to describe self-centered, self-promotional people who view the other people in their lives as mere supporting actors or extras, meanwhile they are, of course, the leading star.

Popular example

Many use Carrie Bradshaw from ‘Sex and the City’ as an example that encapsulates “main character energy,” as she’s often self-centered, entitled, and self-appoints herself as the protagonist by making sure her problems and relationships are always the topic of discussion with her friends.

It’s not a real mental health diagnosis

That said, Kate Rosenblatt, therapist and senior clinical manager at Talkspace, told Insider that, "'Main character syndrome' refers to identifying as the protagonist in your own life story," and it will surely grab the attention of therapists everywhere as it is crucially a new phenomenon aided by the rise of digital platforms.

Social media plays a huge part

We all create narratives around ourselves as a kind of character online, represented only in part by polished posts, navigating an algorithm specifically adapted for ourselves, and basing most of our interactions on people “liking” us. It’s hard not to be self-centered on a social media platform.

Self-promotion and validation

Psychologist Michael G. Wetter told the Daily Mail that main character syndrome is an “inevitable consequence of the natural human desire to be recognized and validated merging with the rapidly evolving technology that allows for immediate and widespread self-promotion.”

Everything is about you and your problems

When you’re talking to friends, family, colleagues, and loved ones, are you always the one sharing your problems and receiving emotional support? When someone asks how you are, do you answer and then forget to ask them back?

You try to make your life look perfect

People with main character syndrome tend to try to present a false image of themselves online to not only come off better, but also to carefully curate their online persona to portray their vision as this main character. They’re effectively trying to sell viewers on the plot of their fictional show.

You are controlling

When crafting this perfect image for themselves, people with main character syndrome tend to be controlling, and they can lash out at anyone who contradicts their image or even cut people out if they don’t fit. They want to choose where to eat, what music to play, which pictures get posted, etc.

You expect people to be at your beck and call

One sure sign that you think everyone is simply an extra to your main character is to assume that people will always be available and willing to meet you or help you out, as if they don't have lives of their own.

You over-dramatize problems

Every problem is like a juicy obstacle that adds to the plot for someone with main character syndrome, so small things become huge disturbances, and solutions are rarely your focus because problems are more exciting.

You’re actually unhappy with your real life

The reason “main characters" try to fictionalize their lives through validation from others is often because their life isn't nearly as perfect as it seems, psychology professor Phil Reed wrote in Psychology Today. This main character becomes something you can control in a world that feels out of your control.

An effect of escapism

“Young people can often feel the need to escape from their reality, whether that’s from the pandemic or other societal pressures,” M'gadzah continues. “Social media provides them with the tools to escape but it can be all-consuming and self-perpetuating.”

Damaging to relationships

If you were treated like an extra or a minor character by one of your friends, how long do you think that relationship would last? People have to naturally take turns being supporting characters to others and share the spotlight.

But empathy is essential

Treating the world with so little empathy for others will only fuel a destructive, isolated, and individualistic society that fails to work together—a skill which is becoming ever more necessary with global threats to our mental and physical health and safety on the rise.

What does the extreme look like?

The closest medical diagnosis psychologists relate to main character syndrome is narcissistic personality disorder, though the latter involves critical, manipulative behavior.

Practice mindfulness

Helen Llewellyn, director at Infinity Wellbeing, told Glamour UK, "Young people can avoid this syndrome by practicing living in the moment. Walking in nature, practical mindfulness or meditation will all help. Tap into who you are now rather than who you think you want to be."

Work on your self-awareness

Start watching this show/movie you’ve been starring in alone, and pay attention to how you think, behave, and react in different situations. Journal them, ask your loved ones for genuine feedback, and turn self-centeredness into self-awareness.