Julie Bowen on Coping With Teenage Chaos and How ‘Happy Gilmore’ Launched Her Career

Julie Bowen, 55, is best known for her roles in TV’s “Modern Family” and the films “Happy Gilmore” and “The Fallout.” She co-stars in the Netflix film “Happy Gilmore 2,” due out July 25. She spoke with Marc Myers.

Both of my parents are strong characters and very different from each other. My father was and is more cautious, carefully assessing things before he does them. My mother was and is a “leap first and then look” kind of a gal, which terrified me.

Growing up, I definitely was more like my dad. I was the type who had to read the whole book on swimming before getting in the pool.

My family lived in a two-story, white-brick house between the Baltimore suburbs of Ruxton and Towson. There was a big field across the road where a neighbor kept horses, and my sisters and I rode our bikes to the country club to play tennis and golf. Life was rather idyllic.

My dad, Jack, is a commercial real-estate developer. I long assumed I was going to be just like him. I watched as he got up every morning, put on a suit, left for work, returned and said important things.

Bowen, in the arms of her mother, Suzanne, with her sister, Molly, and their father, Jack, in the early 1970s

One was, “The golden rule is this—he who has the gold makes the rules.” To me, that meant financial independence is key to being your own person. Independence quickly became a priority for me.

My mom, Suzanne, had worked when my dad was in business school but then became a homemaker after she had Molly, me and then Annie—all before she was 30.

Molly was wildly popular. She was a force and a tough act to follow. At some point, I just decided I wasn’t going to fill her shoes. Instead, I’d go the other way, but I wasn’t sure what that other way was.

I also wasn’t sure how to be around teenage girls and was unsure of myself socially. I often was happier by myself, reading books.

Starting at age 11, I became anxious but didn’t understand what was happening or why. My unease didn’t resolve itself until my late teens.

Looking back, I think part of my anxiety came from watching Molly live freely and come into conflict with my parents. I viewed the friction as chaos, even though the yelling and slamming of doors was normal teenage behavior—even in loving and intact families like mine.

When I’d hang out with Annie, we’d make up stories, put on plays in the backyard and read. We were dreamy and lived in a fantasy world.

At the Calvert School, everyone had to play sports and perform in the play beginning in the third grade. We also had to give speeches in front of an assembly.

Being on stage felt natural. I saw kids up there mumble or make themselves small. I felt I was finally in a place where I could make myself as big as I wanted. I then attended several all-girls schools.

For my last two years of high school, I went to St. George’s, a boarding school in Rhode Island. Boarding was a family tradition, and I wanted to go. There were boys there, and they were funny and kept things simple.

From the left, Bowen, Annie and Molly in Pikesville, Md., in the late 1970s

St. George’s was organized and structured, and everybody had the same parent—the school. Rules and repercussions applied to everyone. I finally learned to enjoy myself. I acted in many plays and was pretty nerdy. In my junior year, I was summa cum laude.

My parents said college was a time to study whatever interested me. They said they’d cover me financially and when I finished, I could do as I wished.

On my first day at Brown University, I met Susanna, who was sophisticated and cool. She said, “Let’s study Italian and live in Florence in our junior year.” I agreed. I majored in Renaissance Studies and spent my junior year in Florence. Susanna didn’t. She was just throwing out wild ideas.

Brown’s theater program was intense and terrified me. I did some acting, but not on the main stage. Then in my senior year, in 1991, an independent short film called “Five Spot Jewel” was shooting in Providence, R.I. I wanted to learn to act in front of a camera, so I auditioned and was cast as the lead.

Bowen, center, in the new Netflix film ‘Happy Gilmore 2’

After graduation, I moved to New York, got an agent and was cast in commercials. I also studied at a small actors’ studio.

In 1995, I was cast as Adam Sandler’s love interest in “Happy Gilmore,” which led to steady film and TV work.

Today, I live with my three sons in the Toluca Lake section of Los Angeles. I bought the house—an updated farmhouse and barn—in 2022 following my divorce.

Previously, we lived in a beautiful midcentury glass box, but my boys were skateboarding into glass walls. We needed something more indestructible.

Growing up as one of three girls had its challenges. Now I marvel at the tranquility of my boys. Girls have a million things to say about everything. Boys say nothing. They grunt and eat food.

Bowen, left, and Jill Biren, pictured in 2022, are co-founders of JB Skrub, a skincare and body-care line for tween and teen boys

Julie’s Venture

Favorite home spot? When the boys are home, I sit in the family room, in the middle of everything. When they’re out, I’m in my office in what used to be the hayloft.

Workout exercise? Pickleball, with a friend. You run your butt off.

JB Skrub? It’s a company my friend Jill Biren and I started during Covid to produce skin and body-care products for boys.

Why? One day, all boys disappear into the bathroom, lock the door and have no idea what to do.

R&D? Our boys helped choose the scent and the packaging and tested them out. When their friends are over, they grab products from a cabinet downstairs.